Sam - Eye - Am's Ride

Name: Sam
Age: It's rude to ask a lady her age
Location: Ox1

Frame: WeThePeople something, with brake lugs ground off
Forks: Oddyssey 41 thermal dirt pro
Bars: S&M slams cut down
Stem: Standard, 40lbs
Grips: Are rubber
Bar ends: Are for queers and jews
Headset: Sits up the front
Clamp: S&M
post: is short
Seat: is raped
Cranks: third hand primo powerbites
Sprocket: oddessey 32 & 1/2 teeth
Chain: KMC kool
Brakes:
Front Tire:KHE maxxis
Front Wheel: proper hub on big city
Rear Tire: hookworm
Rear Wheel: LHD hazard on midway rim
Pegs: are heavier than the sun
Pedals: need replacing

Weight: Heavy like a fat chick full of cake.